It’s been two months to the day since she so suddenly and unexpected left my life. It should be easier for me you would think after all this was a LDR made up mostly of IMs, emails, phone conversations, and text messages.
As many of you reading this know, it’s not.
I still look at the phone expecting it be her, or the text message about my sports teams latest feat to really be from her, some how some way.
During that two months I’ve “met” some new folks through their blogs, and few from mine as well and it’s been a real joy to me.
I see the struggles all of us face in our day to day lives trying to make sense of it all and still have time and make time for that part of our lives that fulfill and sustain us as little else does.
I feel alone at times, but I’m not lonely.
All of those I mentioned earlier are only a click away and I can read the comments and post about them, their lives, desires, goals and all of us trying to find all the answers to the questions before all the questions change.
Those in the midst of tumultuous relationships, dealing with being released, or hurt, not understood, un-collared, unloved, without a Dom or sub etc. are not alone, all of us has some part of that in that, we have lived, will live, or are living it right now as I type this.
I’m an optimistic man who knows it will get better. We all deserve to be happy, wanted, loved, and cared for in whatever way those words mean to each of us, and I believe that we will be.
Life isn’t the same without her, that doesn’t mean it won’t go on and I won’t be happy, there won’t be someone else for me, it just means right now it’s not the same.
I look forward to the new challenges and opportunities that are out there, and I intend to make the best of each and every day because I know she wouldn’t want it any other way and neither do I.
8 comments:
Hello Sir
im sure You have been experiencing a lot of pain with the loss of Blush and there are no words to take that pain away Sir, all i can say is that Your friends are here for You when You need us.
my thoughts are with you Sir.
lupeata
LDR is not just texts phone calls IMs and emails it goes way way further, I know how far and I cannot fathom your pain Collar. I imagine you will always look at your phone, well for a long time anyway.
How are you coping with the "not knowing"? That would do my head in. I would "have" to have the answers to the questions that must be rattling around in your mind.
Keep on keeping on Sir.
xxxx
rosie
Discovering your writing here....very nice. But a recent tragedy has unfolded?? Goodness I am sorry, the pain most be excruciating especially when it was a LDR with limited contact.
Stay strong Sir. I will keep reading.
~healing xx's
Thank you lupeata and rosie.
I appreciate the words and support, very much.
Southerngirl Welcome to my place, thank you for stopping in and very nice comments as well.
Every day is better, life goes on.
Collar
you are luved and treasured...and only you know the depths in which your feelings run, we can only sit by, attempt to provide you with words of comfort, company and the ocassional chidin' when necessary. Your are an AMAZING man who has led a blessed life thus far. Many would give their souls for what you have experienced. Better to have loved than to have never known...
You are always in my thoughts...
*hugz*
I appreciate you stopping by my blog and commenting - I can't even begin to fathom what you are experiencing. I am at a loss for words, for anything I try to say sounds trite. But you've got friends and a community here for you.
-m.
Sending you great big hugs, Collar.
reluctantprincess, thanks for stopping here too! I'm new to your but aquanting myself with it often,and I enjoy it.
I appreciate your word and thoughts here, thank you.
Payne, thank you too for the very kind words & hugs.
Pink, always nice to see you here, thank you also, and the hugs too.
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